Featured Image: Katie Twible coaching. Provided by: Katie Twible
Katie Twible, a seasoned coach with over a decade of experience, kicks off the Coach’s Corner series by sharing three transformative coaching lessons that have reshaped how she leads, and how she lives.
Coaching has a way of changing us in ways we never anticipate.
Although people often see coaches as shapers of athletes, the truth is that coaching transforms you just as much, both on and off the field. I stepped into coaching to help others grow, but I quickly realized the biggest shifts were happening in me.
Through years of competitive ski racing and eventually moving into leadership roles, I actively sought out mentors who were redefining what great coaching looks like. In contrast, I also encountered coaches who undermined the profession, fueling the stereotype that coaching isn’t a “real job.” Experiencing both ends of that spectrum taught me invaluable lessons.
These aren’t just three lessons that changed how I lead; they’ve fundamentally reshaped how I parent, how I work, and how I live.
Lesson 1: Listen to Understand, Not to Respond
As I moved through the coaching ranks, from leading U16 teams to working with the world’s best on the World Cup circuit and eventually stepping into the role of high-performance director, I felt a constant pressure to always have the right answer.
However, what my evolving journey in coaching taught me is that true leadership doesn’t come from having all the answers; it comes from knowing how to listen. Not the kind of listening where you’re mentally preparing your response but listening with full presence and no agenda.
When I began to truly listen, I saw people open up, trust deepen, and solutions emerge naturally. That shift transformed not just how I lead in high-stakes environments but how I connect with people—whether in a boardroom, on the ski slope, or at the dinner table.
I learned this lesson the hard way.
I had just earned a promotion into a leadership role, where I oversaw a group of coaches, many of whom had been coaching far longer than I had. They brought experience, strong opinions, and understandable skepticism toward this younger coach stepping in to lead.
From day one, there was tension. We didn’t always agree on key aspects, and at first, I tried to prove myself by pushing my ideas forward. I responded quickly in meetings and defended every decision. But it only made things worse.
It felt like we were speaking different languages.
Eventually, I hit a wall, realizing I hadn’t really heard them. So I shifted. I stopped jumping in with solutions or judgement. I started asking questions, listening without trying to win the room. And slowly, things changed. The resistance eased, the tone softened, and our conversations became more collaborative.
They didn’t need me to have all the answers; they needed to know I respected theirs. That was the turning point.
Leadership isn’t about being the loudest voice. It is about creating space for others to speak and listen with the intent to understand. That’s when trust begins.
Lesson 2: The Person Comes Before the Performance
In high-performance environments, it’s easy to prioritize results, especially when keeping your job for the next year relies heavily on those results. But I found that lasting impact comes from investing in the human behind the results and the goals.
I learned to ask, “What does this person need right now to be at their best?”
Additionally, a great coach and mentor once told me, when I took on my first major role leading the Women’s Ontario Provincial Team, ‘It’s not about how you get fired; it’s when you get fired.’
The reality is that in high-performance coaching, even if you’re doing an amazing job, someone might still fire you or choose not to bring you back. So, what do you have to lose?
Embracing this mindset shifted my focus. I prioritized the athletes’ well-being, which boosted both outcomes and morale, ultimately driving better results and helping us achieve our goals.
Another occurrence that made me look harder into this critical aspect of coaching was when I watched a coach turn off their video camera at a high-stakes race and say, “Well, she is not my job security.”
That coach was fired at the end of the season, not because of the athlete, and rightly so. It was never the athlete’s job to be his job security.
But imagine if he had taken the time to truly coach the athlete. He might have discovered she’d been struggling with her period for months, battling unexplained exhaustion. He could have adjusted her poorly fitted equipment that was causing back and knee pain, which led her to overcompensate in her skiing. He might have even learned that a breakup the night before the race had emotionally shaken her.
Great athletes are shaped by more than just training; they’re people first. When coaches invest in the person, not just the performance, the results often follow.
Lesson 3: Clarity Beats Control
I once believed that effective leadership meant overseeing every detail. However, my experience with coaching revealed that establishing clear expectations and upholding consistent values can achieve far more than micromanagement ever could.
When people understand the “why” and feel ownership in their work, they rise.
I’ve worked in organizations where micromanaging by leadership led to resentment and frustration by season’s end. In contrast, when leaders provide structure but trust their staff with ownership, it fosters a positive environment and stronger accountability.
In environments where coaches feel appreciated and trusted, collaborative discussions among the group still take place. These meetings play a crucial role in reinforcing the team’s mission, ensuring the team recognizes and executes it.
However, everyone coaches differently, bringing different strengths and weaknesses to the team. So, I have learned it is advantageous to help support, guide, and mentor the weaknesses while emphasizing their strengths.
Letting go of the control can be hard, but it creates a space for growth and progress amongst all.
I didn’t learn these three lessons in a single moment but over a decade of coaching. I lived them, practiced them, and at times, earned them painfully. They have changed the way I lead teams, coach athletes, and raise my own family. And the learning continues.
If there is one takeaway from all these lessons, it is the better we coach, the better we live.
Whether you are coaching a team or raising a family, remember: clarity inspires and control constrains.
About the Author: Katie Twible
